Would You Like Schlagobers With Your Eiskaffee?

Grüß Gott! Sorry about the lack of recent posts, but Chris and I decided that Grammy and Grampy have been very good this year, so they deserved a week with Soren, completely free of parental anti-spoiling maneuvers. And then we figured that we've been pretty good, too, so we decided to take a trip to Vienna!

There are many things to say about our trip, and I could probably sit down and try to compose a post with narrative structure and stuff, but I would never get around to finishing. In short, we had a great time, and Vienna was, as my good friend Hannah put it, "tortenly chamberful".

Ah, the torten. I'm not sure how Austrians maintain their figures, because as far as we could tell, they subsist mainly on torten and coffee. It was hard, but we made do. Chris stuck with espresso, but since I'm eating for two and require extra calcium, I was forced to order Eiskaffee, which is a lot like iced coffee, but with ice cream instead of ice cubes. Perfectly reasonable substitute, if you ask me.


Hey! Look how pregnant I am!

Oh, and since the US dollar is getting sand kicked in its face by the Euro, Chris economized by drinking wine and beer instead of water. We cut corners wherever we can.

OK, while we're on the subject of food, I would like to pose a question to everyone who has not been to Austria or Germany, because I want to see if you're dumb like me. Quiz: which of these is a Wiener Schnitzel?

A.


B.


C.


Correct answer: B. Am I the only one who thought the answer was A? I really, really thought I was asking for a sausage when I ordered Wiener Schnitzel the other night, but then they brought out this gigantor fried cutlet, and I was like, Huh? And then I was like, Duh, wurst is sausage. My American concept of schnitzel had been warped by long-ago visits to this fine franchise, and I had no idea that schnitzel was a cutlet. In any case, it was quite tasty, and if I'm the only person who didn't know what schnitzel was, shut up because I don't want to hear about it.

There's lots more, but I'm jetlagged and don't feel like writing any more. More soon! Until then, a beauty shot of a little shack on the Danube. As always, our photos are here.

Happily Ever After

You will be thrilled to know that I did, in fact, get satisfactory results from the ice cream maker last night. No one's happier about that than I am. Mmmmmmmmmmm.

Unforgivable

I'm pretty sure any woman who is now or has ever been pregnant will tell you: don't get between a pregnant woman and her food. Sadly, a member of our household broke that rule yesterday, and was almost thrown out the window.

Don't worry -- it wasn't Soren. It was our ice cream maker. We always had such a good relationship, Ice Cream Maker! Why did you betray me?????? WHYYYYYYYYYYYY!?!?!?!?!?!?

I'd made custard for chocolate ice cream on Tuesday (the end product has been described as "like a punch in the mouth with a chocolate bar," which is definitely a good thing), but I forgot to put the stupid ice-creamifying bowl in the freezer in time, so I froze the bowl and chilled the custard overnight, and was all ready to roll yesterday after Soren went to bed.

With anticipation in my heart, hunger in my belly, and a stretchy waistband on my pants, I turned on the ice cream maker, set the timer for 30 minutes and waited. At last, the timer summoned me to whip the towel (extra insulation) off the ice cream maker and behold...........

Custard.

Chilly custard, to be sure, but not fluffy, frozen, edible ICE CREAM which I WANTED RIGHT THAT SECOND and I COULDN'T EVEN GO TO THE STORE TO GET CRAPPY SUBSTITUTE ICE CREAM BECAUSE THERE ARE LAWS AGAINST LEAVING YOUR TODDLER ALONE IN THE HOUSE.

But I did not defenestrate the traitorous appliance. I decided to put both bowls in the freezer overnight again and give it a second chance. And yes, OKAY, I did eat some of the custard before I put it back in the fridge, but only enough to convince myself it wasn't really the same and I should hold out for the real thing.

Wish me luck tonight. I'd hate to have to do anything rash.

Taking a Break from not Blogging

I have all kinds of good excuses for not blogging lately. My life isn't that interesting -- that's a major one. Also, everyone in the house has been sick, and Chris was in Vietnam in two weeks and is now in Anchorage for a week, and blah blah blah.

Soren had hand-foot-mouth disease (it's more fun to call it Coxsackie virus, frankly) over the weekend. The poor guy was covered in spots, had a fever, and was very sad because his mouth hurt. On Monday, Renee and Ian came over (Soren got Coxsackie from Ian in the first place, so it was OK for them to play together) (sorry to out you as a disease-spreader, Renee), and we had a nice time -- walked to the park, started making muffins, put Soren down for a nap when he started flipping out because the muffins weren't done yet, finished making muffins, ate muffins. I think all the excitement used up Soren's energy for the rest of the day, though, because all he wanted to do after his nap was watch Cars. We watched it three times. And I was not allowed to leave his side, or else much whining and screaming and "Mama, are you coming RIGHT NOW?!?!?" would commence. So Soren and I watched Cars three times on Monday. Unnnhhhhhnhnhnh.

The story has a happy ending: he feels better, and is back to his usual silly self.

I went to the OB for a checkup yesterday, and she said The Deuce was measuring a little large. Uh-oh. I mean, Soren was almost nine pounds, and he never measured large. Hmmm. Perhaps my special diet of Carnation Instant Breakfast, celery with hummus, and ravioli (not all at the same time) is some kind of fetus-embiggening regimen. If only I could choose to eat other things.

Soren had to come with me to the doctor's office, which he wasn't too thrilled about, but I psyched him up by telling him a) the doctor wouldn't be examining him; and b) he would get to hear the baby's heartbeat, and it sounds like "WWSHEEWWW WWSHEEWWW WWSHEWWW". In his words, "That's pretty silly!" When the doctor got the Doppler out and started moving it around to find The Deuce's heartbeat, it made its usual crackly noises, and Soren said, "It's a thunderstorm!" Then we got to hear the heartbeat, and he thought it was quite funny. I think the only major disappointment for him was the fact that they didn't have any lollipops, which are an important part of any doctor visit.